Blossom fails to contain Tenacious D’s epic, ridiculously rocking concert

 Cuyahoga Falls Ohio Tenacious D will be the world's biggest band in another dimension.

   Jack Black, with his pure golden pipes, will rightfully reign as rock's ambassador and unite the world with songs from rock, weed and er, rock.  Kyle Gass KG's guitar playing will inspire millions of kids to pick up their own instruments, to look as cool as his hero in the mirror.  And the movie The Pick of Destiny would have been a big hit at the box office.

   But this is not another dimension.  So we have to face the reigning supreme D at the Blossom Music Center on Friday night.

   Explaining this is no small feat.  It's just that even in this dimension, it's the kind that should always be played loud and Move over Taylor Swift and Beyonce here come JB and KG.

   I am a child.

   The 20-song, 85-minute concert was the first from the artist-musician in the Greater Cleveland area in a decade.  Of course the two played a huge solo with the hit tribute Wonder Boy Friendship and a song that's so dirty, with lots of hilarious sketches/interludes.

   It was a dream come true for anyone who bought the duo's debut album as a kid in 2001 or watched the previous HBO special and tried to stop Mom and Dad listening.  It was rock hard R-rated comedy, with enough F bombs and sax jokes to make a pirate blush, and the crazed crowd responded by abandoning their maturity in the parking lot.

   But there was more.

   The monster was a silver mechanical creature that danced robotically to The Metal.

   Sax A Boom was a dance tune featuring a toy saxophone played by Black and a melodic recorder solo by Gus.

   After about two minutes, the band broke up after Black blew the gas handle, as well as reconciled through the song.

   But apart from all the gimmicks, the show went as well as Dee and his crack trio backed the musicians.  Not only are the bands harder than other comedy acts, but there are a lot more serious bands.  The group found it easy to rap in metal songs like Beelzebubs The Final Showdown, which is a testament to the quality of the musicianship on stage.

   And that's what helps Tenius D.  If these guys didn't take their craft seriously, the show would be nothing.

   If you don't believe it, give their recent Audacity special The Road to Runners a serious listen.  The songs are well composed and full of jokes and show a deep knowledge of popular music history.

   As for his chops, Black's voice is remarkably malleable, just as he growled, screamed and snarled his way through the concert.  Can he flick a guitar pick unbelievably, even though that's considered part of his chops?

   And as a master guitarist who never got his due, he threw down one delicious acoustic lick after another.

   He also worked hard.  Kale, who looked like he hadn't shaved or shaved since the start of the coronavirus pandemic in 2020, immediately broke into a sweat and didn't stop walking across the stage until he broke into a few songs during the Jables show.  Thin Lizzy's prison break as a band.  Gass also revealed some of his own moves, most notably on Sex a Boom.

   Some of the biggest singles I've heard at Blossom this year drew crowds, a feat considering there were no lawn seats for the Friday show.  And not just on well-known songs, but also on lesser-known songs like Kickapoo.

   For the audience Friday Night D were the biggest and best band in the world and no one could have convinced them otherwise.  And this is the real world we are talking about.

   Now, how do I get to that second dimension?